Newspaper
by Soo W
Summary: Fred and Angel read the Saturday paper and talk about vampires.


Newspaper 1/1

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters in this fic and make no profit from it. I took the "vampires in popular culture" themes from "Vampire Films" by Colin Odell and Michelle Le Blanc (ISBN 190304717X) - I don't know them and no infringement of their copyright is intended.**

Newspaper 1/1 

"So, you're an ordinary vampire in this dimension?"

Angel shifted uncomfortably in his chair, and then looked over at Fred. She was curled up on a sofa in the Hyperion's lobby, surrounded by segments from the Saturday paper.

"Yeah. But I'm not evil. You know, I help people."

Fred nodded. "I know, Cordelia explained." She turned back to the Living section. "Hmmm. Chintz is back."

Angel got up and strolled over to the sofa. He cleared himself a small space by scooping up the sports pages and putting them on the coffee table. "What did she say?"

Fred looked up, "Huh?" 

"Cordy… What did she say about me?"

"Oh!" Fred let the paper fall to her lap. "That you didn't kill people, or drink their blood, at least while it's still in them, you know." She peered at the paper again, and then, looked up at Angel over the top of her glasses. He was frowning at the carpet. She said, anxiously, "You don't, do you?"

Angel started, "No!"

"Oh good!" said Fred, relieved.

Angel picked up the gardening section and leafed through several pages of adverts for shrubs. "So… it doesn't bother you? Me being a vampire in this world?"

"Oh no," Fred shook her head. "My room mate, before I went to Pylea, she was writing a thesis about it."

"About VAMPIRES?" Angel exclaimed. Fred smiled and for the thousandth time, he felt himself smiling back, without quite knowing why.

"No. Silly. About vampires in popular culture. Films, mainly."

"Oh." Angel pondered this for a while. "What were her conclusions?"

Fred was deep in the politics section. "George Bush? Is that even possible?" 

"Fred?"

Her forehead scrunched up as she tried to remember. "She thought vampires represented the aristocracy vs the herd."

Angel examined his fingernails. "Well, I do come from a noble order."

"Y'know, Count Dracula and the fearful peasants. Vampires commanding men to do their bidding." Fred continued. "A noble order of good vampires? Are there lots like you then?"

Crestfallen, Angel shook his head. "No, actually, the rest are all evil."

Fred smiled encouragingly at him. "Still, maybe you've just acquired a bit of extra, added nobility, huh? Then there's fear of death or growing old. The elixir of eternal youth."

"It's not all it's cracked up to be." Angel grimaced.

"No?" Fred tore herself away from the obituaries, and looked at him curiously. "You don't want to live forever?"

Angel shook his head firmly.

"Of course, the other side of eternal life is the religious angle. The vampire is not alive but he's also not judged. Every time he kills he moves further away from heaven and closer to hell." She saw the look on Angel's face, and quickly added, "I didn't think that was her most convincing argument."

He smiled gratefully at her, and her heart missed a beat.

Flustered, Fred sifted through the remaining pages until she found the health supplement. "Oh! And she was doing a whole chapter on vampirism as disease. You, know, a contamination that can be passed on. Through the exchange of, well, you know... biting and such like."

"It's very misunderstood." Angel reassured her quickly. "It's actually not very easy to make a vampire without meaning to."

"Really?"

"Oh yeah," Angel nodded. "Just day to day interaction, us sitting here, or touching, or even..." He noticed Fred was hanging on every word. She realised he was looking at her and turned back to the paper. He coughed, and picked up a glossy magazine. Opening at a random page, he found a table of horoscopes. "All completely safe. So... what else did she think?"

Fred blew out her cheeks and then shook her head. "I don't recall any more. Maybe that was all she got finished by the time I left."

"Oh."

"Why?" Fred asked, keeping her eyes fixed on the front page headline.

"Well," Angel picked some imaginary bits of fluff from the knee of his trousers, "I think most, well, some people would say a lot of it is about, you know..." He made a vague gesture with both hands.

"Really?" said Fred, going pink. "Well, now you mention it, perhaps there was the odd chapter about that."

"That?"

"Use of the vampire as a metaphor in a repressive culture..."

"Repressive of...?"

"Yes," Fred nodded and avoided the question. "Repressive. Vampires as a safe way of confronting taboos and..."

"Hmm-mmm?"

Fred gulped "...and coded eroticism. Like even when it was not done to show couples to kissing in the movies, it was all right to show a vampire breaking into a woman's bedroom late at night and seducing her and sucking her blood."

She stopped, and went back to hiding behind the paper. Looking down at the page, found herself glued to a list of that weekend's church services.

"Oh!" Angel sank back into the sofa. "I see."

There was a silence. Angel picked up the Arts pages.

"Fred?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you want to go and see a movie?"


End file.
